Top Five Movies You Will Show Your Children Someday

Everyone remembers the first time they saw a great movie that touched their lives. When we were younger, most of the time it was with our parents. When you are a parent, what will you show your kids to help shape them, show them the world, or teach me a lesson? This is what we would choose.



Kevin's List


5. Animal House

One of the best comedies of all time. I was in a fraternity in college, and loved every second of it. I would never force my son to join one, but if he saw how great some of those characters were and how much fun they had, hopefully it would give him a shove in the right direction.

Pictured: The right direction

4. Hoosiers

I love this movie and what it represents. I want my son to be a team player in no matter what he does. This movie showed that hard work, dedication, and team work can pay off. Plus it shows Indiana and what it is like there. I'd want my son to understand where I used to live and what is valued there.

Can't beat those Hickory High warmups

3. Toy Story

Although most of my choices are trying to shape and educate my son so he could grow up to be a good man, this choice would be to show that growing up doesn't need to happen overnight. Kids should enjoy being kids, because it doesn't last. Toy Story taught us all to cherish the things that made our childhood great. I'd want my son to hold onto whatever was special to him while he watched this.

2. The Dark Knight

I know this choice will be criticized. Superhero movies come and go, with very few being able to relate to a different generation. I wouldn't choose this for it's story or special effects. I would choose to show it because of the amazing, once in a life time performance by Health Ledger. I would want to show my son what happens when a great actor becomes obsessed with a role. So obsessed, that it took over his life, and eventually consumed him. Watching TDK knowing Ledger ending up dying due to that role makes every second of him on screen suspenseful and mesmerizing. Few actors have ever pulled that off for an entire movie.

The therapy costs will be worth it

1. Saving Private Ryan

You can't understand WW2 fully by reading about it in a textbook. WW2 was the defining event of the 20th century, and probably the largest influence world wide in several hundred years. It launched the US and the USSR into superpower status, thus leading to the cold war and eventual end of Soviet Russia. The stakes had never been higher. A pure evil force was committing heinous acts. It took a near world wide effort to stop Hitler. Although millions lost their lives, countless more were saved by the heroic acts of the Allied Forces. Even though SPR only depicted one platoon of American soldiers, the attitude, bravery, and heroism was accurately portrayed. Every person should see the first 20 minutes of this movie, and understand the kind of sacrifice it took for liberation from evil.

These men stared death right in the eye

Pain Train's List

#5 The Gatekeeper

   Although not particularly good in terms of acting or production, the movie touches upon an issue (immigration) in which the human factor is all too often ignored. I believe movies can be wonderful learning opportunities and I would use it as so.

 

#4 Field of Dreams

 Mainly because my father watched it with me so I feel like I should return the favor. As baseball is one of my undying loves, I want to share that passion. It also opens the conversation for a lengthy conversation to baseball history.

#3 Old School

 Mind you my kid may have to be a tad older to view this classic, but I think a good natured comedy is a great bonding experience. Also, this marks the beginning of a great 2-3 year run for comedy and comedy actors such as Will Ferrell and Vince Vaughn. It allows one to reminisce  about those awesome college years. 

#2 Shawshank Redemption

Just an all around amazing movie. The characters, the story, the acting all are impeccable. It also lends itself to wonderful analogies and truly touches upon race, incarceration, and the human condition. Just a riveting movie and a great watch with offspring. 

#1 Rudy

  After watching this movie you want to do SOMETHING with you life. You want to follow you passions and be happy. That is all you want for your kids. 

Tjack Attack

#5  Avatar

I common story plot remastered by James Cameron.  I was deciding between this and Dances with Wolves (identical plots) when I decided that contemporary was more fun to watch and more enjoyable for kids.  A native people trying to be domesticated and an outsider makes their way in.  Falling in love with a woman and defending them as though his new family had always been in his heart.  A great movie, technologically innovative, and perhaps a classic in the making.

#4  Hoosiers

A movie that will move with the generations.  My father showed me this as a kid and I will pass it on down to mine.  A great movie that illustrates hard work and determination can beat innate ability.  This movie takes you through family problems and people trying to leave the past to the story of love and the classic cinderella story in sports.  A great movie and classic that need to be seen by everyone.

#3  Dumb and Dumber

The classic comedy ever person should see.  Countless times this movie has sent me into uncontrollable laughter.  I am not sure this movie can be replicated in terms of its ability to create humor.  Like any comedy, love is part of the plot, but it does not adversely affect the greatness of the movie.  Funny, Funny, Funny

#2  Rudy

Another story introduced to me by my father that will be shown to my kids.  This movie teaches determination and your right to dream.  Heaven forbid that you go out and get that dream.  A true story for the ages about a kid who was told was too small, walks onto the Notre Dame’s practice squad and thrives as a traditional role player.  After his hard work he gets his opportunity to play in his final senior game in the forth quarter.  He was carried off the field by the shoulders of his teammates, and the last person to be carried off that field.  Great movie and good lessons for the children. 

#1  Braveheart

A classic story of love and revenge where you can never underestimate the true power of love.  With historical relevance and its legendary war scenes, this movie a classic.  A great story that follows the pursuit of one man and his loyal followers as they attempt to create a sovereign Scotland free of King Edward the I and his tyrannical rule.  Wonderful movie.

Flash-Master's List

#5—Remember the Titans—Plus points for being one of my favorite movies of all time, enjoyed by (almost) all who watch it (cough Pain Train cough) political and historical undertones, and vintage Denzel at his peak. Emerged for me as the top sports flick just because it does the “team struggling against all odds to overcome and win” thing in a more enjoyable way than anyone else. Great soundtrack too.

#4—The Matrix—Watershed mind-trick movie. Struggled between this and Inception as the genre standard-bearer, and ultimately decided that Matrix has withstood the test of time a little (at least for our generation) and so deserved the nod. Bonus points for Keanu Reeves’ acting (how has he NOT won 5+ Oscars??).

#3—Avatar (3D Version)—A controversial pick because of overused plot lines, mediocre acting (to be kind), ridiculous hype and a bit of “take ourselves too serious” syndrome. However, when we are talking about showing our kids films, we are looking for some sort of tangible “thing” they can relate to. By then, all movies will be 3D or holographic or something, so if we are discussing movies they need to see, the epoch that started it all should for sure be included. The most stunning visual film of all time.

#2—Star Wars: Episode IV A New Hope—A sheer classic, A New Hope gets the nod as the representative flick for the original Lucas trilogy, even though Empire Strikes Back was undoubtedly a better film. Showed people that things could happen in the movies that couldn’t happen in real life. A fantastic escape, and a genre-defining science fiction flick. Also, really established a precedent for sequential sagas that with all due respect to Indy Jones, has only been truly approached by the Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter series. One of the first films to develop a true cult following.

#1—Wizard of Oz—For the simple reason that you can literally see the shift in movie technology in the middle of the film! No other film has done it like that. Likable characters, fantastic stories, historical significance with the populist/gold-standard/wizard thing. Special memories of watching it with my own family mean that it will have generational significance, and one of the films that my parents could talk to my kids to about how important it truly was for the cinema and entertainment industries.

Till next Tuesday...

Top 5 Things You Love to Hate about Christmas

Christmas has a lot of traditions in a lot of different countries, cultures and homes. Some of them you absolutely love. Some you absolutely hate. This list is a combo of both; Things you love to hate about Christmas...






Pain Train


5. Our Family Tradition of Singing Happy Birthday to Jesus on Christmas Morning


My family lines up and sings Happy Birthday to Jesus before opening gifts on Christmas morning. Is this a ridiculous and silly tradition? Absolutely. But is it meaningful and important to my family? Absolutely. Thus is the beauty of any tradition. I am definitely not a fan of performing a tradition for traditions sake and that is why I "hate" this. But I love the genuine and affection feeling it arouses in my family.

Jesus sure has aged well over the years. Ab cruncher?

4. The Snarky Comments In-Between the Words of Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer

I am referring to the people who add things to the original Rudolph song. Examples of this include "like Monopoly" or "like a light bulb". The reason I hate this is associated to the type of person who does this. It is usually the ubber enthusiastic, brown-noser, Boy Scout type who insert this phrase. Unfortunately, as much as I hate this I find myself doing it every single time. I can't help myself. It has an almost metaphysical ability to illicit snarky singing compliance.

 

3. The Family Christmas Picture and Letter

We all make fun of the family that feels the need to update us on Jimmy's penalty shootout to win state cup. It really just serves as a platform for families to assert some type of "holier than thou" image to its families and friends. And while we look at this hubris with disdain, we gobble them up and read every minute detail. We study the pictures and reread the letter. We hate it, but can't turn off our feeble yearning to resist. 

How can we spin "Daddy lost his job"

2. Obnoxious Christmas Lights

I am talking about the house that decides to make it a personal goal to be seen from space. The house that has more lights than Disneyland. The house that single-handily needs its own grid. The extravagance and pride that goes into this production is somewhat sickening. You are basically saying, "I want the attention, look at me". It should really be, "how many accidents can I cause by having people stop and stare at my house?" I say that but every year we get in the car as a family and tour the block of houses that does this. We turn on Christmas music and point out the different set-ups and ensembles. We secretly wish our parents had done it to our house growing up.

1. The ABC Family Channel's 25 Days of Christmas

Check out these titles: Holidays in Handcuffs, Christmas Cupid, I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause, and Snowglow. These truly awful titles match the truly awful reality of the movies. But as awful as they may be, they are enjoyable. The endings, while predictable, are heart-warming and reinforce the Christmas spirit. To top things off, they do a great job of including good looking people to headline these flicks. This year's lineup included the likes of Chad Michael Murray, Christina Milian, Mario Lopez, and Ashley Williams. You hate to love them!

How long until Nick Cage plays a leading role in one of these? 

Tjack Attack

5.  24 hour Christmas Story Marathon

Even though this is a classic, watching it once is enough.  But every year it seems that I watch it once at every new house I go to.  “Deck the Haws wif bells of horry, fa ra ra ra ra ra ra ra ra”  “you’ll shoot your eye out” and who can ever forget the leg lamp.  Great movie.

4.  Carolers

Everybody complains, but when a caroling group shows up at your house you can’t help but smile a little.  The joy of spreading joy to people in the form of song might not be my cup of tea, but I sure can appreciate what they are doing.

3.  The Mall

Every year I tell myself that I will not step a foot into a mall during the Christmas season, and every year I end up there fighting my way through the crowds.  Pain in the ass?  Sure.  Hate trying to park? Hell Yes.  Feel like killing people in the lines?  Don’t want to go there.  But it is all worth it that Christmas morning when your gifts create smiles on the loved ones you have given them to.

2.  Waking up at 7:00 AM and not having to go to work

Everybody hates to wake up early on their days off.  But there is something about Christmas that requires you to wake up early.  Getting up early and joining my siblings in front of the fireplace to rummage through the stockings just before we dog-piling the parents will always be considered

1.  Driving 600 miles in two days to visit family for the Holidays

As we become older and we begin to build our own families and professional lives it becomes more difficult to get home for the holidays.  Even though I hate the hours spent on the road, it is all worth it when your parents meet you at the door with a smile, a hug, and a kiss to welcome you home. There is nothing like family during the holidays.

Flash Money's List

#5—Fake Santas that look NOTHING like Santa—It seems like every mall I walk into there’s one of these dudes, and I kinda feel bad for them because I know they are just trying to find a few extra hours of work over the holliday, but come on. I feel like if I were six years old and tried telling my wish list to some 35-year old skinny black dude dressed as Santa Claus, it might put my belief at risk. At the same time, kinda funny

#4—Advent Calendars—I do like the candy. However, incredibly stupid holiday item. I suppose I’m looking through it through jaded yuppie eyes, and I’m sure kids still love them. But for some reason when I see them in grocery stores, I have the urge to rip down the display. But at the same time, kinda amusing.

#3—The fact that approximately 216,595 ballet companies put on the Nutcracker every year—Seriously, aren’t there any other holiday ballets you could do?!? Can I get a little Swan Lake during December?? But at the same time, kinda fitting. 

#2—Christmas Songs on the radio…in November—I’ve always said that once the calendar flips to December, all was fair game when it comes to Christmas music. But when you’re driving around town in stupid traffic watching the stupid Black Friday crowds who have been camped out for six stupid hours to buy stupid Harry Potter meets Twilight action figure playhouse and the stupid dude on the radio keeps crooning about one foggy Christmas eve, it makes you just beat your head against the steering wheel. At the same time, affirms the holiday season is here, and kinda heartwarming.

#1—The daily radio spots about how much it would cost to actually purchase every item in the 12 Days of Christmas song this year—Shockingly, multiple reports have people telling me they have never heard these? Really?? Really?? I feel like I hear them 4-5 times a day from whatever overpaid radio news updater the stations choose to pull from the ranks of the gainfully unemployed. In any case, hear one and you’ll know what I mean. But at the same time, maybe interesting… in a way that makes you upset with yourself for being interested.

The 12 Days of Christmas costs...

Kevin's List

5. The Songs

  

I am so sick of these songs. I have heard them for years. But I still sing along and smile because they remind me of great memories spent with people I care about. If I had to listen to them all year long though… I might turn into Jack Nicholson from the Shining.

All Rudolph and no play make Kevin a dull boy...

4. The weird food that is only available this time of year

Christmas has some of the weirdest and strangest food. Food and drink that is not tolerated or accepted the rest of the year. Seriosuly, have you ever tried to buy egg nog in July? Or a peppermint latte from Starbucks? Only during Christmas is something as gross as fruitcake an acceptable dish. I still chug Egg Nog and eat candycanes though. Cholesterol  and cavities be damned. 

You don't want to know what else showed up when I searched "fruitcake"

3.  The horrible TV Christmas Specials that every TV show does

I don’t know what TV series started the tradition of having a holiday themed episode but I’m sure they regret it now. A great Christmas episode is hard to pull off. Practically every story/angle has been used. Reunion with an angry family member? Check. Dad tries to buy the last Barbie doll in town? Check. Son accidentally destroyed all the presents? Check. Yet, I still tune in. I think only the Office and the Simpsons have had great Christmas episodes. Don’t even get me started on the Star Wars Christmas special. 

George Lucas will do anything for an easy buck

2. All the midgets that become gainfully employed for 2 months out of the year

I’m not sure if midgets or dwarves or whatever are a protected class, but they freak me out. Usually I don’t see them 11 months out of the year unless I accidentally switch to TLC and the latest “midget family with 10 kids/bakery/motorcycle shop” show is playing. But that although malls can employ fake Santas, it is pretty hard to hire fake elves. They have to go authentic with this one. I always feel so awkward and creeped out when I walk by and a little person is staring right back at me.  Anyone ever see “Bad Santa”?

25% our size- 5000% evil

1.      1.  Cheerleaders in Santa costumes

I am all for cheerleaders and believe our world would be a better place with them in more situations. How much more would you enjoy your job if after you completed your TPS report you had a gaggle(their proper name for a group) of cheerleaders celebrating your success? I do think though that dressing them up in skimpy Santa outfits perverts the childhood innocence of Santa. I feel guilty that the “Mrs. Clause” shown on the TV turns me on. 

Am I right?

Till next Tuesday...

Top Five Sporting Venues You Need to See Before You Die

We here at T5T love our sports. Probably 80% of our conversations revolve around them. We all have places we dream of going, and if we were told had six months to live, we would book a ticket to the following locations.




Pain Train List


5. Camden Yards
I will be the first to admit that Fenway and Yankee stadium may have more history, but Camden absolutely revolutionized stadium architecture in the United States. It made smaller, artisitic, urban parks the norm and helped replace the concrete dumps our teams called home. Without it a whole generation of parks would cease to exist

4. Pipeline, Hawaii


The mecca of surfing is truly a testament to amazing ability of humans to master its surroundings.  A prefect barrel the can give you the ride of you life or the last ride of your life, this “venue” is located on a reef just a few feet from the shallow water. A few hours at this wave will put on the fast track to sports enlightenment.

3. Estadio Azteca


This stadium hosts over 100,000 people at an altitude of 7500 feet above sea level. Additionally, it is located in one of the world’s true Megacities. It has been home to the Olympics and World Cup Finals. Currently, it is the home to El Tri also known as the Mexican National Team. I would literally give my pancreas to see a U.S.- Mexico soccer game here.

2. St. Andrew's Golf Course


I prefer history and minimalism in a sporting venue. St. Andrew’s fits both categories. The birthplace of golf has a purity that is unmatched. Even though rain, wind, and fog often envelop it, this course wears the elements with a natural serenity that makes it beautiful.

1. Lambeau Field


How Green Bay, Wisconsin has a successful franchise in the country’s most popular sport is dumbfounding. This stadium gives me goose bumps thinking about the classic games and grudge matches of long ago. Bleachers, brats and brew make this transcendent stadium the apex for sport. It represents what’s pure and passionate in a sports era defined by the glamorous.

Kevin's List


5. Wimbledon- Centre Court


The premier tennis event each year. Over the last few years, some of the most epic tennis matches have taken place there. Nadal-Federrer, Federrer-Roddick, and that epic 70-68 5th set match from last year. Wimbledon is as classy an event out there. Strawberries and cream, British Royalty present, and the all white playing attire. It is without peer.

4.  Augusta National


If there is a heaven and if you are fortunate enough to make it there, Augusta would be the home course. Despite it's backwards views on women and minorities, the course itself is the finest in America. Just walking around the course is a step back in time. I would go sit by Ike's tree, which President Eisenhower would frequently strike while playing, and enjoy a beautiful day in Georgia. 

3. Fenway Park


The most unique and historic ballpark in America. Sorry Cubs fans, but Wrigley is for lovable losers and crappy beer. Fenway is the best experience in all of baseball. I have been there twice and have loved it there. Knowing that nearly every great player you could think of has played at least once there is a humbling notion. 

2. St. Andrews- The Old Course


The birth place of the finest game there is. It still hosts one of the most prestigious golf tournaments, The Open Championships. Whenever the British Open is held here, it always seems extra special. It would be pretty amazing to play a course that has had people hacking away on it for almost 600 years. The fact that it is not a private course and anyone with the time and money can play it is astounding. 

1. Assembly Hall- Home of Indiana University Basketball


This had to be my #1. I went to Indiana University, and spent many winter and spring nights at Assembly Hall watching my Hoosiers. The atmosphere, the championship banners and the memory of Bobby Knight make Assembly Hall one of the best experiences in college sports. I made this my number one because I love being a Hoosier, plan on taking my children here someday, and is the most likely on my list for me to actually visit. Indiana, oh Indiana, Indiana, we're all for you...

Flash's List

#5—Augusta National Golf Course—Plenty of history, Plenty of Scenery. Home to some of the gentleman’s game’s greatest moments. Slight nod over St. Andrews as the golf nominee for pure aesthetic beauty and how very few people actually get to set foot on the hallowed ground.

#4—Churchill Downs—Another historical pick. One of those places I already know would give me chills and yet somehow I know I can’t fathom the extent to which they would actually take me. I can only imagine stepping onto the same infield as the tens of thousands of men and women who cheered their way through the Roaring 20’s, the Great Depressions, two world wars and a half century afterward. The only place that really and truly matters in America to one of its oldest and most gamely sports.

#3—Wembley Stadium—Home to England’s National Team and many of the most celebrated moments in futbol history. The architecture as well is majestic. The most recognizable venue for the world’s most popular game.

#2—National Baseball Hall of Fame—Once it was decided by the powers that govern this game that the HOF should be eligible, it belongs on any list. To ignore it or to come up with some reason that it just doesn’t sit well is to ignore both history and logic. This simple: If you are truly a baseball fan, you can live without visiting Fenway or Yankee Stadium or Wrigley or Camden. But you can not at all consider yourself a true baseball fan and die without a visit to Cooperstown.

#1—Madison Square Garden—One of the few venues on any of these lists that transcends the boundaries of individual sports. Home to some of the greatest boxing matches in this nation’s history (including Ali-Frazier I, a previous list mention), countless concerts (perhaps superfluous to mention) but most importantly, the hallowed grounds of basketball in a city that cares more about Naismith’s baby than any other in the world. Has been a part of the United States’ most iconic city’s landscape since the days of Boss Tweed and Tammany Hall.

Tjack Attack

#5 - Wembley Stadium, London (English National Team home stadium)

Home to the English National team, this stadium also hosts the latter stages of the FA Cup.  Could you imagine the atmosphere inside this stadium when an important soccer game is being played.  Holy Crap, I shat myself just thinking about it.

#4 - Notre Dame Stadium

Home of the Fighting Irish and probably the most storied college football team ever to step foot on the gridiron.  I could only imagine having the opportunity to watch a Notre Dame v. Michigan football game.

#3 - Fenway Park

I must first give a shout out to Yankee Stadium.  The only reason it did not make this list is because we did not make this list one year ago, and I know my brother will not be judging this week.  Anyway, this is a beautiful stadium and one that has a storied franchise.  From Babe Ruth to the Curse of the Bambino, this stadium has been home to many memorable moments in baseball history.  Oh yeah, you can’t forget to mention the Green Monster.

#2 - Madison Square Garden

Home to the N.Y. Knicks and Rangers, but often these two teams are a back seat to their legendary concerts and boxing matches.  This is where M.J. played his first professional game.  Notable boxing matches:  Rocky Marciano v. Joe Luis, Ali v. Frazier I and II, Hopkins v. Trenadad.  Concerts to mention:  The Doors, Jackson 5, The Rolling Stones, Elvis Presley, Bob Dylan, and Led Zeppelin.

#1 - Soldiers Field (Chicago Bears)

Home of the Chicago Bears and the only sports stadium that is a monument to our armed forces.  Not even considering the history of the stadium, the meaning behind the name would give me chills as I approached this beautiful piece of architecture.

Till next Tuesday...