Kevin's List
5. Miss March
A 2009 comedy in which a high school dork and his inexplicably hot girlfriend decide to lose their virginities to each other,but the dork accidentally knocks himself into a coma. He awakes four years later and his hot girlfriend is now a playboy bunny. He and his sleazy best friend travel across the county to reunite. Incredibly crude yet satisfying none the less. Basically I feel the same way after eating McDonald's as I do after watching Miss March.
4. Roadhouse
We all know this one. One of Swayze's best performances. We all wish we could party at a bar like the Double Deuce. This is the perfect movie to jump into a third of the way through. RIP Dalton.
3. Heavyweights
Thank God this movie came out when it did. Before the childhood obesity epidemic, making fun of fat kids was acceptable. These days, I am sure there would be some fat kids advocacy group that would protest this movie and say how insensitive it is. Great movie overall, with Ben Stiller stealing the show.
2. She's the Man
One of Amanda Bynes finest performances to date. When I was 20 and on vacation, this movie played over and over again on one of the channels in our room. We practically knew every line. I know this is a horrible movie but I will always have fond memories reciting lines with my sister.
1. A Walk to Remember
A touching story that shows that if you are attractive enough, you can date anyone in your high school. This is the movie that launched a thousand more Nicolas Sparks books/movies. This came out when I was a freshman in high school and after seeing it it gave me inspiration to try and find the dorkiest girl possible and try and date her.
The Pain Train's List
5. “Selena”-
Growing up I had a little sister who actually believed she was Selena. This was not some petty kinder flash-in-the-pan either. She stopped answering to her real name. We had to call her Selena. Therefore every Friday and Saturday night of my young adolescence was spent next to the buck stove fire listening to the soothing tones of Bide, Bide, Bumba (Did I even spell that right?). And you know what, I didn’t mind it. I complained, and oh did I complain, but then I ended up gazing into the eyes of an uglified Jennifer Lopez as I dozed to sleep. Best part of the movie hands down is when two homies present Selena with a bumper and say “Anything for Selenas”
4. Monsters-in-Law
Ladies and Gentlemen—Jennifer Lopez is the doyen of my list. Anytime, I can use doyen I should win, hands down. So even if my list is the essence of shame, I just used doyen three times. But, in my defense, Jane Fonda plays one hate-able bitch. So much of a bitch that you actually root for Jennifer Lopez’s character. You are tricked into cheering for a character portrayed by Jennifer Lopez! This has to speak about the potential of this movie, right? The real reason I love this movies--I am unspeakably attracted to Lopez and her character and my altruistic nature is satisfied as the maid wins in the end.
3. Sister-Act
Raise your virtual hand if you break into song at the sight of this movie. And not just any song—religious song! I am not a Whoopi fan (because if I was I would be the president, vice president, and sole member of that fan club), but I do like the lounge singer extraordinaire Deloris Van Cartier. Besides the singing we get to see shoot-out scenes with nuns in Reno, illegal church activity, and even an appearance by the pope himself. Furthermore, I can continue to play the altruist as Sister Mary turns around an inner city neighborhood—all through song.
2. 27 Dresses
Two years ago I lived in an old rectory with 10 women (No, I will not explain). Early one morning, I woke up with a killer H.O. I stumbled to the living room and into one of my favorite movies. At 9:00 on a random Saturday, I walked into a scene where a gorgeous Katherine Hegel is chilling with her equally hot sister at a bar. I instantly was drawn in and my hangover was cured. At 2:00 PM on the same day, one of my roomies was watching this fine film. I strolled into the room and was gazing at the same exact scene- I AM NOT JOKING. Same scene, hours later. And you know what, I sat down and watched the whole movie again. That’s the sign of a quality bad film. You can watch twice in one day.
1. Definitely, Maybe
The only movie on this list I have Tivod just to have continuous access too. Ryan Reynolds gives the performance of a young Chick-Flick lifetime and Isla Fisher makes you want to drop everything and read Jane Eyre. Look, I hate movies that “make me feel” and that are cliché. For goodness sake, I hate “Remember the Titans” for those exact reasons. But this movie throws my heart for loops for the entire 90+ minutes and every time I am shocked by such a predictable outcome. Maybe it is the cute girl that plays his daughter or maybe it the fact I see Ryan Reynold’s character as a shadow of myself. Whatever the case, I would stop the Laker game I am watching right now in favor for this movie and I am ashamed to say that.
Corey's List
5. The Notebook
Probably the most predictable title in my Top 5, and sure to be duplicated on other lists, but I feel like when the most prototypical chick flick of the last ten years actually makes you have to tell your date you’ve got something in your eye, it’s gotta be there…
4. Summer Catch
A deadly combination for a die-hard sports fan trying to save face… A sappy love story, Jessica Biel in a soaked white top and just enough baseball to keep it interesting. Matthew Lilliard as Billy Bru is a guy we’d all either love to be (or at least have as a wingman). Even now, Freddy P leaving the mound in the 9th of a no-no to save his true love evokes the new Webster’s definition of mixed emotions.
3. Mean Girls
In college, it was that movie that HBO kept mercilessly playing from 10pm to 4am in the late-night Friday and Saturday slots which make it prime-time viewing for “get back to the house wasted and zone out” mode. It was also that movie that no matter how many times you saw it, you kept pretending like you didn’t care and that you needed to go to sleep, but somehow, you ended up still being on the couch watching it an hour and a half after you started. More than enough guilty-pleasure soap-opera-ness to sustain itself. Major bonus points for Rachel McAdams with an edge, a smoking hot Tina Fey playing out the teacher fantasy and the constant reminders of what Lindsay Lohan could have been…
2. Swing Vote
Not that I am really embarrassed by liking the film (or at least not until cataloguing the looks I get from everyone to whom I laud it) but a necessary break from the “chick flick” tsunami of the rest of my top choices. The fact that I would elect Kevin Coster’s young, politically savvy conscience in pig-tails to any public office right now is another potentially blushy thang. Also emblematic of the similarly embarrassing fact that ever since Field of Dreams, Tin Cup and The Perfect Game, I would watch Costner lick envelopes on camera.
1. Serendipity
Few movies could do a better job taking the “men” out of sentiMENtal than this Cusack-Beckinsale destiny saga. Some of us also don’t think that ‘buying something every time you see it for posterity’s sake’ is all that crazy an idea. Special props for Beckinsale’s smile, a great cameo by Ari Gold Piven and a continuously comedic role of the evilly eclectic
T-Jack's List
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5. Definitely Maybe
4. Notting Hill
3. Miss Congeniality
2. P.S., I love You
1. A Walk to Remember
If you ever have some time to kill, or want to connect with your more feminine side, give these movies a look. Just don't tell anyone about it.
Till next Tuesday...
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